Being a woman...!!

Hows it like being a woman??!!. Every single second of my life, I have always felt proud being a woman. I have never felt that my woman hood stops me from achieving something in life. Today's woman is perceived to be nothing less than a 'super woman'. She works 8 hrs a day (if only more) shoulder to shoulder with her male counterparts, where she is faced with extremely challenging situations as her male counterparts. She also has to face that 'khadoos boss' or an irritating colleague.

She is expected to be back home on time, prepare a four course dinner and manage the household chores, manage the kids single handed. Its like we are put on a marathon. After one point of time (of course marriage) you are supposed to just run. There is no time where in you can just stop, sit back and spent some time for yourself.

I remember one of my married friends telling me, "enjoy your time now Poorni. Once you are married, you would never get time for yourself."

Yes, I am a woman. I work shoulder to shoulder with my male counterparts, and to be in the race I need to outperform them. Yea I am a woman...!! But the society sees me through a colored glass. "You are a woman...you are not supposed to stay late, if you do...then your security is your responsibility". Is it a crime being a woman??

A teen was molested in public by a mob in Guwahati, right on our streets? What are we coming to. Shame on us India, shame on the media...who stood there recording the whole incident rather than trying to act. The justification given by the spokesperson of that particular media was 'our camera person and reporter couldn't do anything as they were a mob of 20 people'; the same statement proved wrong when the reporter said, what started of with 6 boys later turned to 20.

As far as the media were concerned, they had struck gold. Airing footage of a woman being molested  by a bunch of criminal minds was definitely something that would send their TRPs sky rocketing. To all those people who said, 'she was partying late into night, she invited trouble'. Come on...!! I thought we were living in a free country. Just because I am a woman, you cannot compromise my right to decision.

Every other instance, when an attack occurs over a woman, the media celebrates it for some time till they get  another 'political juicy drama' or a terrorist attack. Then everything is gone for good.

In a country where Jessica Lall was shot dead in the wee hours in a bar, where a bunch of mad people bet up women in a pub in Mangalore in the name of moral policing, where a battered Baby Falak succumbed to Cardiac arrest, where every 26  minutes a woman is molested, every 34 minutes a woman is raped, I feel sick to say that 'I am a Woman'.






You work shoulder to shoulder with your male counterparts. 

The so called 'moral police force'

"Man beaten up by mob commits suicide over alleged extra marital relation" - not a headline that would take up more than 5 mins of a news bulletin these days. Consciously or sub consciously we are getting used to this whole idea of moral policing. We don't take a second off to think that we need to learn to respect some one else's private life.

Recently I had gone house hunting and the kind of person whom I bumped into has made me write this. I was so desperate of finding a new place that I decided to try out my friend's idea of walk into the apartment and enquire with the watch man or the care taker whether flats were available for rent. I walked into this newly constructed building and after enquiry at the gate, I was directed to the office of the 'site in charge'.

I introduced myself to the pleasant looking young man who was sitting behind the table and explained my requirements. Having listened to me very patiently he made a random search for the keys and suggested that I meet the site supervisor, since the keys might be with him. After waiting for about 10 mins, I was introduced to a very arrogant middle aged man.

Before I could open my mouth, he started questioning me in a fashion which reminded me of the police interrogation sessions in movies.

"Family?"

"No...3 ladies."

"Fine...but no gents are allowed in." He ordered as I wondered whether I was going to be a tenant in an apartment I rented out for or some college hostel.

"Ok..it will be just the three.." He wouldn't let me complete

"Everyone says so in the beginning, but they start bringing in 'boy friends' once they shift in."

I couldn't still make out what some one did in their very private space affect him.

I couldn't get a glimpse of the apartment even though I went through the whole do's and dont's list. Apart from recollecting this in a humorous perspective, an instance which my friend narrated to me later did justify his reactions to some extend. 'A man was found in a 'compromising position' in an apartment in where the occupants were few non keralite girls working for an IT giant. What followed resembled nothing less than a masala movie. Arguments and counter arguments between the residents and the 'guy', cops were called in and finally some how the issue was hushed up.

As we discussed this issue in our circle, I could hear different opinions and even different 'versions' to the same story. Many got into discussions about 'morality' and supposed cultural degradation. But I had a different observation to the whole occurrence. I really couldn't understand on what basis could some one interfere into another person's private space. I really couldn't digest the integrity of the neighbors who were so keen on finding out what was actually going on.

When will we learn to respect some one else's personal life. But the provocation could be, to put in my friends own words "nammal kanji kudikkumbol appurathu irikkunnavan biryani kazhikkunnathu sahikkumo". Translating it for my non-keralite friends, "how would you feel when you are having porridge while the other person has a five course meal."

I guess its high time that we react. The more you succumb, the more the people will push you.